Feed on
Posts

As I have discussed it previous episodes I am in the process of writing a couple of books. A Girl Called Bitch is an account of portions of my childhood. 

As a child I was both physically and mentally abused. While the physical wasn't as often. The mental abuse was daily and left scars and damaged that has taken the better part of 40 to unpack. While I am now on a fairly healthy track. That wasn't always the case. I did things I am not proud of, I made many mistakes and I took risks that weren't necessary just to feel alive.

I have spent a lifetime hiding from myself and hating the person in my mirror. While it addresses reasons for some of the damage. It isn't one of those books that blames mom and dad for my issues. At the end of the day you come to an age where you have to decide what type of person you will be. you can be the forever victim or you can go build the life you want.

This book focuses on working past the trauma and issues to build the life you want. The majority of us go through shit while growing up. It isn't an excuse or reason to be a dysfunctional or fucked up adult. That my friend is a choice! 

No matter how 50 shades of fucked up your childhood or life has been. You have the power to fix it. You got this. Go live your best life!!!

Forgiveness for ourselves and others can be a challenge for most. While we might offer forgiveness to others we never muster the grace to forgive ourselves. If you don't forgive yourself then how can you be a complete person or good partner? I am not talking about forgiving yourself for cutting in front of someone else. I am talking about the dark shit that has impacted your life, shaped the direction of your life, held you back or even the crap your nightmares are made of. 

Learning to grant yourself forgiveness for those things will free you to go after the person you were meant to be.

Be Strong ~ Be Fearless ~ Be Forgiven

 

11 steps to help you on your way to forgiveness:

  • Learn yourself and your emotions. Only when you truly know your own mind will you be able to walk down the path of true forgiveness. What I mean is if you pretend or try to not get messy then you aren't addressing the ugly crap or forgiving the things that are holding you back.
  • Journal, video tape, blog, talk out loud or whatever your thing is, do it. Acknowledge the mistakes outlaid or writing. Write out why you feel you need to be forgiven and then how forgiveness will change your life. 
  • Learn and gain experience from your mistakes and things you need forgiveness for.
  • Feel free to go back many times if needed to address a mistake or time in your life. It isn't a race, finish at your own pace.
  • We all have those inner voices that say crappy things to us. Our own worst critics. Learn the patterns of that voice. Such as when it makes its debut and when it shuts up.
  • Journal about when the voice/critic gets the worst. What is being said?
  • Tell it to shut the hell up!!! And Mean it.
  • Define what you want and start working out steps to get there.
  • Learn your own patterns. If a certain situation makes you act a certain way and you don't like it. Don't put yourself in the situation over and over.
  • It is natural to go back to the self defeating talk and ways that got you feeling like this in the first day. Be it a bad day or set back. it is easy to go back to the self hate that is so comfortable. Instead, try something new.
  • Grace, compassion and love. Here is the kicker. Show these emotions to yourself! Often!!!

Stop Making Excuses and Get OFF Your ASS!!! This lesson is a tough one to swallow some days. Let's be honest. There are a million excuses why it won't work or to justify not doing it. The question is what if it does work? What if you get that new job, lose the weight, find a lover, start a business, spend more time with someone you love and on and on.

How much time do you spend each week watching TV, watching sports, playing video games, watching porno or on social media? Still think there is no time to cook, go to the gym or do other things? It comes down to Motivation and Priorities!!!

 

11 Steps to Stop Making Excuses

  • Stop comparing yourselves to others
  • Stop with the fear already
  • Stop blaming other and take responsibility for yourself
  • Get off your ass
  • Baby steps; small goals maybe a week or month out and no more; at first
  • Learn from your mistakes
  • Focus on your strengths and accomplishment not on weakness and failure
  • You have the power
  • Don't doubt yourself
  • Visualize your goals and hustle
  • Progress not Perfection

 

Self Care ~ The lost Art of Me Time

I never really saw the need for self care. I thought it wasn't needed or it was a form of pampering. Maybe in the back of my mind I didn't deserve self care. I needed to serve others to not focus on myself. To avoid the face in the mirror. Avoid what was looking back at me. 

Now I "Stand and Look with Love!" I am proud of the person I am becoming. I now like to occasionally spoil myself with self care. It might be a drive, camping, yoga, road trip, new pillows, a candle, trip to farmers market or a plethora of other things. The fact is I finally realize I matter and am worth self care. My hope for you is if you are struggling. Reach out to someone. You deserve happiness and self care.

Dictionary.com says self care is: care of the self without medical or other professional consultation. ( I would like to add this is an extremely Lame definition of self care!)

Google: 

  1. the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one's own health.
    "autonomy in self-care and insulin administration"
    • the practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress.
      "expressing oneself is an essential form of self-care"
       
       
       
       

Back by popular demand. Worst Dates Ever! You can submit worst dates on my facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/savanah.jane.524 or website. Unscripted.media

If you have ever been too thin or heavy by todays standards you might notice that plenty of people have plenty of advice for you. Helpful things like eat something or you shouldn't really be in a restaurant. Bullying is called out in so many aspects of life. However, the shit people will talk to another person over weight is rarely discussed or addressed. Why? Taboo or the elephant in the room???

For those of you in the job market or about to be. Good luck, network and believe in yourself!!!

If you are one of the millions of people living and suffering from debt, I know it can be scary. I know the feeling of never being able to get ahead. Never just having enough financially. Instead there is fear and doubt. Money and debt can be your only focus. As scary as it is there are great resources available at no cost. You will make it through this time of your life.

Believe in yourself and don't give up!

Personally, I recommend Dave Ramsey who has books, website, free materials, radio show and podcast.

 

Know your numbers! Know how much debt you have, how much your monthly payments are and how much your checks come out to each month. Only by knowing the numbers will you start coming to terms with the hurdles in front of you.

Marijuana worth the great debate or just people blowing smoke. What side of the fence do you land on?

This episode is for all of the Unscripted ones out there who get lost, frustrated, confused or blocked when it comes to setting goals and sticking to them. if you are like me you have spent so much time surviving that setting goals wasn't needed or even understood. 

I spent a life time of watching my family members barely get by. Blame everyone for their own failures and lack of success. As I learn more it becomes more evident that the art of goals, isn't as much an art as a learned behavior. So, what happens if you never learned that behavior? There is still time and it isn't as daunting as it seems.

I will be posting guides on both my website: unscripted.media and facebook: https://www.facebook.com/savanah.jane

Urban Dictionary:

When someone's not had sex for 3 years or more; also if they've had surgery for a tighter fit.
She been revirginized & I can't wait to try her out!!
 
Go with out sex for a couple years and consider yourself a virgin again? Really, is that how it works? What are your thoughts? Leave a comment hear or jump over to my facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/unscriptedbysavanahjane
 
Some see virginity as innocence and purity. Is that something you get back?
 
Are you currently in a drought? Jump over to facebook and tell us how long.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Pardon the dust and mess, Unscripted is in its soft launch phase.

- Older Posts »